User:Lm34gt45/The Big Fat Hole

Here is a typical story about donkeys penguins who… erm… read on to find out, obviously, ‘cause I’m not gonna tell ya anyway.

Chapter 1

It was a nice and pieceful, sorry, peaceful day in Club Penguin. LMGT, his friends, and some random penguins were having a discussion.

“Odd weather, eh,” LMGT said.

“But the narrator said it was peaceful!!!” said Nutty, breaking the fourth wall in his horribly obnoxious voice. Nobody knew why he was sitting with the other penguins anyway. He is usually admiring his bald head in the mirror (you gotta love that barber who cut those feathers off of that disgusting penguin’s head).

“WHO CARES!!!” said another extremely radioactive penguin, named R.A.D.I.O.A.C.T.I.V.E. True to his name.

“Hello, will y’all CALM DOWN???” said a totally NON-obnoxious penguin, named Johnny 115.

With a groundbreaking (in the literal sense) fissure, some odd thing popped out of the ground.

“Is it Herbert again?” asked Cooldude254, another friendly penguin.

Nope, it wasn't.

Chapter 2

“WASSUP dudes?” asked (was that a question?) WATuDOIN, a ‘cool’ penguin.

“Wat ARE u doin?” asked Cp kid, a not-very-arch-but-sorta-arch enemy of WATuDOIN, although nobody knew why.

“You’ll see, yo!!!” said WATuDOIN.

“:/” eveyrone emoted.

“Why r u starin at mah like that, yo?” asked WATuDOIN.

“Will you please stop saying things in that manner? And could you please tell me where you got the materials for that thingy from?” asked R.A.D.I.O.A.C.T.I.V.E.

“And why did you do that anyway, shaking the ground for no reason?” asked Chill57181, through an extra-loud mike who had been witnessing the scene in the Town from the Lighthouse.

“Hurr, y’all will see later! Time to go, yo!” said WATuDOIN.

And then, in a brilliant flash of light (or smoke, no one could tell), WATuDOIN disappeared.

“HE’S A NINJA???” everyone exclaimed, including Chill, through the loud mike.

Un-ninjas stared at them.

“Er… isn’t it normal? I mean, thin air is a part of nature!” said Cp kid, in a brave move to save the ninja’s secrets. And, thankfully, it did the trick.

Chapter 3

It started raining the next day.

“Told ya so.” said LMGT.

“Oh, nice prediction.” Said Cooldude. “By the way, where are Chill, Johnny and Cp kid?”

“Oh, them? Apparently, they seem to have gone on a voyage to Rockhopper Island!” said LMGT.

“O______O That’s crazy!”

“But it’s cool.”

“Hey, did someone fix the hole at the Town?”

“I don’t know, let’s go check.”

So LMGT and Cooldude went to the Town.

“I don’t see anything,” said Cooldude.

Meanwhile, in the big ship at sea, away from the storm…

“I’ve packed some fish pizzas and some seaweed pizzas. I also have some sandwiches, just in case.” said Cp kid.

“I’ve got chocolate pizza.” said Johnny.

“And I’ve got some chocolate donuts.” said Chill. “We seem VERY ready.”

“I hope so,” said Johnny.

Chapter 4

Meanwhile, in the rain, LMGT and Cooldude were trying to find the hole in the ground.

“Whoa… giant puddle here,” said LMGT.

“Giant frozen puddles everywhere.” said Cooldude.

“Is this Sensei’s evil plan?”

“Maybe not. Why would he do this anyway?”

As they were walking, LMGT and Cooldude found something soft under their feet. Suddenly… BOOOOMMMM AT 2000000 DECIBELS!!!

“Uhhh…” said LMGT, surprised at what happened.

“Heh heh heh.” said a familiar voice. It was HERBERT!!! Along with him was the weird WATuDOIN.

“Yo, dude. This Harbutt dude hired me for BIG cash! I created this pit!!! I rulez!!!” said WATuDOIN.

“Call me Herbert, you baboon-penguin hybrid!!!” said Herbert.

Then, in a flash, Herbert and WATuDOIN went away, in a manner, that looked like as if they were teleporting.

LMGT was speechless. Then he wondered “Where is Cooldude? I don’t know where he fell.” So LMGT started walking in search of Cooldude. Suddenly, the opening of the pit closed. LMGT and Cooldude were trapped!

Chapter 5

As LMGT was walking along, he saw a penguin.

“COOLDUDE! Is that you???” asked LMGT, running towards the shadowy figure.

“Waddya do?!” said a crazy-looking, mutt-styled penguin.

“Hey, that’s not Cooldude. It’s a crazy penguin.” said LMGT.

“Don’cha dare call me that!” said the penguin. “I’ve been stuck here for the whole night, which may explain my condition.”

“Oh, sorry. By the way, my name’s LMGT. What’s yours?”

“My name’s Flickzer. Nice to meet ya. Wanna get out of this hole? Anyway, there’s nothing else to do.”

“Okay. But before getting out, we’ll find my friend, Cooldude.”

“OK, then. Let’s go.”

So, Flickzer and LMGT walked along the lonely path, in search of light.

“Do you have anything to help us see light?” asked LMGT.

“We’ll see rain. Anyway, I’ve got bombs. They can help us get out.” Said Flickzer.

“What sort of bombs?”

“They’re really powerful. They are… METHANE BOMBS!!!”

“WHAT? Do you know what methane bombs CONTAIN?”

“Don’t worry, reeelax.”

“Why SHOULDN’T I?”

“I have oxygen masks.”

“Oh, that’s nice. But wait! Not everyone has an oxygen mask to protect them. This bomb may have the ability to cause MASS EXTINCTION of penguins!!!” said LMGT.

“Oh, yeah. Hey, it’s night on my watch. It’s glow-in-the-dark, you know.” Said Flickzer.

“Nice! Let’s sleep.” said LMGT.

And off they went… to sleep.

Chapter 6

In the morning, there was a lot going on in the boat…

“Arrghhh… bedbugs bit me!” said Chill.

“Bedbugs ATE me!!!” said Johnny, who had been scratching himself since 4 O’ clock in the morning.

“I was squishing bugs all night.” said Cp kid, the drowsy penguin who had created a gruesome graveyard at the place where he was sleeping.

“Now that’s NOT a pleasant sight AT ALL.” said Chill.

“Let’s go back to Club Penguin. Who KNOWS how far Rockhopper Island is anyway.” said Johnny, who still was itchy.

So they headed back to Club Penguin Island.

Chapter 7

Meanwhile in the seemingly endless tunnel, LMGT and Flickzer were walking. Suddenly, in that dark tunnel, they saw a penguin-shaped figure.

“Hi LMGT!!! I’m Awesome335 here!” said the penguin.

“Oh hi, AWESOME!!! Man, am I glad to see you!” said LMGT.

Meanwhile, at the Beach, the 3 penguins docked their ship.

“Wow! I’m sure glad we reached safely!” said Cp kid.

“Sure!” said Johnny. “Why don’t we go to the Town? Maybe LMGT and Cooldude are there!”

“Okay! Sounds like a plan.” said Chill.

So they set out for the Town, but the result was obviously NOT what they expected…

Chapter 8

“Where are they? Cooldude phoned me and said that he’d meet us here if we decided to come back early!” said Johnny.

“Well, maybe Herbert turned non-veg and… well…” said Cp kid.

“WHAT? Don’t be silly!” said Chill.

“Where are they???” asked Cp kid.

They were in a dark and disgustingly smelly hole.

“I’m as thin as a CHICKEN BONE!!! Please give me FOOD!” said LMGT, a big glutton whose shriveled up penguin body was thinner than a toothpick. “If I don’t get out, I won’t be able to see pictures of LAMBORGHINIS and McLARENS and PAGANIS on my computer!”

“Chill.” said Flickzer. “I’ve got a jetpack. We can get out of here.”

“But the opening of this tunnel has closed.” said Awesome.

Just then the opening of the tunnel opened.

“… nevermind.” said Awesome.

“But how can a jetpack carry ALL THREE of us?” asked LMGT.

“Too bad for you guys. You don’t have one. I’m getting out ‘cause I do. SEE YOU GUYS!” said Flickzer.

And off Flickzer went, into the rain.

“HE BETRAYED ME!!! I KNEW I COULDN’T TRUST DONKEYS!” said LMGT, steaming, or better said, frying.

“Dude, chill. We can find a way to get out of here.” said Awesome.

“How do you manage to stay so calm? Anyway, we can get out of here. I quite sure we can. Just think of all possibilities. At least one will work.” said LMGT.

“Maybe we can climb out?” said Awesome.

“Nope, the hole is too deep.”

After tons of brainstorming Awesome finally came up with an idea.

“Why don’t we TELEPORT outta here???” said Awesome.

Both facepalmed. How did they not think of that before?

“Now we can teleport Cooldude out too! Meh EPF Spy Phone RULES!!!” said LMGT.

LMGT had tweaked his Spy Phone a little, to teleport more people.

So they teleported out of there, along with Cooldude. Simple. On the same millisecond they teleported out of there, there was a loud thump.

“OUCH.” said an unknown, but familiar voice.

Awesome, Cooldude and LMGT were bewildered.

“Was that Cp kid who shouted out so loud?” asked Cooldude, the most bewildered of them all. “How did you manage to get me out of the hole anyway?”

“We teleported you out.” said Awesome.

“Oh, so even you were stuck in there? Cool, but not so cool!” said Cooldude.

“FOOD!” said LMGT, pulling out the box of chocolates he got from a mission. And in one-millionth of a second, all of them were gone.

“Anyway, what was that voice all about?” asked Cooldude.

And again, the opening closed.

Chapter 9

“Well, so here we are.” said Cp kid.

“Where are we?” asked Chill.

“I don’t know.” said Cp kid.

“Waaahhh…” cried Johnny in a sarcastic way.

They were in the messy hole WATuDOIN created.

Suddenly…

“FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!” shouted LMGT.

Do you know how many Os were in there?

"Was that LMGT???" asked Cp kid.

“Hey, the narrator wants us to tell him how many Os there were.” Cooldude said.

“Please, I don’t like walls. And the fourth one isn’t an exception.” Awesome said.

Chill, Johnny and Cp kid were walking along when…

CRASH! A mutt penguin crashed from the sky.

“WOW! Now that’s… ODD!” Chill said.

“Hey, the rain stopped.” Johnny said.

“Someone, help here.” the penguin said.

The penguin let out his dirty, dirty, DIRTY hand. Chill, Johnny and Cp kid started whistling.

Who was that penguin anyway? It’s quite obvious. It’s Flickzer!

Chapter 10

“Erm… will we ever get outta here?” Chill asked.

“Help meh.” Flickzer said.

But his dirty hand was SO dirty that if he even touched a millimeter of a piece of bread with his hand, even a penguin who has nearly starved to death won’t eat it. Everyone except LMGT, of course.

“Hey, will you get up on your own?” Cp kid said.

Those were the best words anybody has EVER said. Everyone will agree. Except LMGT.

“Who is behind this anyway?” Johnny asked.

“It HAS to be WATuDOIN.” Cp kid said in less than a second.

“Maybe.” said Chill.

Meanwhile, LMGT, Awesome and Cooldude were searching for their friends.

“Oh my god.” LMGT. And then he let out the same string of Os in food.

“Dude, we will get food, don’t worry.” Cooldude said.

“Hey, maybe they’re in the Pizza Parlor.” Awesome said.

LMGT stared at him.

“What?” a bewildered Awesome asked.

“You RULE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” shouted LMGT.

Hmm… they could’ve thought of that before…

So they went to the Pizza Parlor.

LMGT used up ALL his coins on pizzas. He ate them in a short time, in an amount of time which looked physically impossible.

“Hello, do you remember why we came here?” asked Cooldude.

“Erm… to fill your tummy and empty your pocket???” said LMGT. Will he ever get over his gluttony?

Awesome and Cooldude facepalmed. They bought pizzas for themselves, anyway. ‘Cause they didn’t find Chill, Cp kid or Johnny.

But well, there were no more pizza ingredients left. Awesome and Cooldude felt like eating LMGT themselves! They wouldn’t care if they were cannibals.

But luckily, they controlled themselves.

“They’re not here.” said Awesome.

"Why don’t we go to their igloos?” suggested LMGT.

“Nice idea. Let’s go.” said Cooldude.

So they went to Chill’s igloo. Nothing except decorations and his beloved Epic Cannon.

They went to Cp kid’s igloo. Nothing there either.

Ditto with Johnny’s igloo.

“WHERE COULD THEY BE?” shouted LMGT.

“Hey, we haven’t searched the whole island yet.” Awesome said.

Suddenly, a voice which sounded like Chill’s said, “AAUUUUUUGGGHHH! I need a bath!”

“What was that all about?” Cooldude said.

It was an odd situation.

Chapter 11

“Get OFF me.” said Chill, rather crossly. OK, let me reframe that. VERY crossly.

And then the most unbelievable thing happened. With one ULTRA STRONG hit with his flipper, Chill sent Flickzer flying.

Who needs jetpacks when you’ve got Chill’s hand?!

“Anyway, where is this place?” asked Cp kid.

“It’s in the Town, silly.” Johnny said.

“I want food.” Chill said.

“Oh, LMGT! Is that you???” Cp kid asked.

“No, that’s me.” Chill said.

It’s a natural tendency. Whenever anyone says “food”, LMGT flashes in their mind.

“I want food.” the real LMGT said.

“Dude, you ate 1 gazillion pizzas. And also, Earth Day will have to be serious this year. Why? Because the bill has used up a LOT of paper. And it’s STILL printing.” said Awesome.

“NEVERMIND THE BILL! LET’S GET OUTTA HERE!” LMGT said.

“Erm... okay.” Cooldude said. “Let’s go.”

"Hey! The bill is flooding the Pizza Parlor." said the manager, but it was in vain. Nobody responded.

They went to the Town.

The opening of the hole opened again, but then closed (was there any need for this sentence?).

Chapter 12

In the hole, a thing started flashing. It was a light! It was the SUN! No, the opening had closed. It was the light from a TV!

“Welcome, penguins with the wrong colors.” a penguin said.

“It’s WATuDOIN.” said Cp kid.

“How do you know?” Johnny asked.

“I’m his arch nemesis, remember?” said Cp kid.

“But how ARE you his ARCH NEMESIS anyway?”

“That, my friend, I won’t tell.”

“WELCOME, PENGUINS WITH THE WRONG COLORS.” said WATuDOIN, trying to make a clearer entry.

“Hey, check your color first. It’s blue.” Johnny said.

“But that’s what Herbert told me to say.” said WATuDOIN.

The 3 penguins facpalmed at his stupidity.

“GO ON WITH THE SPEECH! SERIOUSLY! YOU PRACTICED BEFORE THE MIRROR 100 TIMES!!!” said Herbert.

“So, I command you to surrender now, to me, Herbert.” said WATuDOIN.

“WHAT?” said all the three penguins at the same time.

“Err…” said WATuDOIN. “Hey, don't take my balloon, Harbutt!!!”

“Call me Herbert, you donkey.” Herbert said. And then Herbert and WATuDOIN started fighting.

“I DIDN’T KNOW THAT THE CLUB PENGUIN TEAM MADE HERBERT INDULGE IN VIOLENCE!” said the 3 penguins, breaking the fourth wall.

“Ouch!” said the fourth wall.

Chapter 13

“Heard that?” asked Chill. “Sounds familiar.”

“Yeah.” said Johnny.

Chapter 14

“Chapter 13 is over already???” Cp kid asked.

“Okay, enough four walls stuff. Let’s get back to the story.” Chill said.

“Hello, miserable mutts.” said Herbert.

“We’re NOT dogs.” said Cp kid.

“Do you think I care?” Herbert said.

“Erm… no.” said Johnny.

“You DARE stop my speech.”

“But you asked us. It’s not my fault.”

“But it wasn’t a question.”

“The author put a question mark at the end of the sentence.”

“Oh, he did.”

Herbert needs to work on interrogation.

“Continue with your pointless speech, Herbert P. Bear.” said Chill.

“Erm… where was I?” ASKED Herbert (I don’t want any more arguments).

“The mutt thingy.” said Cp kid.

“OK. So I’ve been observing you penguins and I have found out that you people are dying to tip the Iceberg.” Herbert said.

“I told you it was pointless.” said Chill.

“But I knew that the iceberg’s name is the Iceberg! I’ve observed you all very well.” said Herbert.

“OK, I thought WATuDOIN’s speech was worse than yours. But well…” Johnny said.

“Hey, don’t you dare contradict my thoughts.”

The 3 penguins started laughing.

“WHAT’S SO FUNNY?” asked Herbert.

“Your thoughts!” the 3 penguins said.

Chapter 15

Meanwhile, LMGT, Awesome and Cooldude were searching for them.

“Where could those three have gone?” LMGT asked.

“I don’t know.” said Cooldude.

Suudenly, a TOTALLY random penguin came in. “Do you wanna shoot yourself out of my Epic Cannon?” he said.

“What gives?” LMGT asked.

“A TRIPLE LAYER SANDWICH!” said the random guy.

Without thinking LMGT rushed towards the cannon.

“Hey, it’s a trap.” said Awesome.

LMGT still ran on.

“He doesn’t understand the meaning of trap, does he?” said Cooldude.

“Not when he’s heard something related to food.” said Awesome.

So Cooldude and Awesome ran to LMGT. They caught his legs!

“Let… me… go…” said LMGT.

LMGT struggled, struggled and struggled some more. He was wriggling like a shrimp!

LMGT wriggled powerfully. It was too much for those 2 penguins to handle, so they let go!

He ran towards the Epic Cannon faster than he’d ever run.

He got inside the Epic Cannon.

The timer for the cannon started to count. Ten… nine… eight……………… just as when the timer counted to one, Coolude and Awesome got hold of LMGT’s beak.

All three broke the wall (not the fourth wall, the Pet Shop one) and went straight to the Town.

Just then… the opening opened!

Chapter 16

The 3 penguins went straight into the hole. They landed in the hole with a loud BANG!

“Ehh… isn’t this the hole that all three of us fell into before?” said LMGT.

“My head is spinning from the crash landing.” said Awesome.

On the other side of the hole…

“Who was that?” asked Cp kid.

“Who cares?” said WATuDOIN.

“YOU!” said the 3 penguins, laughing.

Johnny found a remote. He shut WATuDOIN's TV off.

Hey, couldn’t they find that before?

“I suggest we go and investigate.” said Chill.

“Well, obviously. What are we gonna do in this smelly, useless hole anyway?” Cp kid said.

So they went in the direction of the noise.

Chapter 17

“OH EM GEEE!!!” said Cp kid.

“OH EM GEEE!!!” said Johnny.

“OH EM GEEE!!!” said Chill.

“OH EM GEEE!!!” said Awesome.

“OH EM GEEE!!!” said Cooldude.

“OH EM GEEE!!! Anyone has food?” said LMGT.

Everyone except LMGT facepalmed.

YAY! WE FOUND YA!” said Chill.

“You guys were in the hole?” asked Cooldude.

“We were!” said Johnny.

“Hmm… so that where those odd noises were coming from!” said Awesome.

“We made odd noises?” asked a bewildered Johnny.

“WES.” said LMGT.

“What happened to you, LMGT?” asked Chill.

I nid wammy.” said LMGT.

“Oh, I know why this is happening.” said Cooldude. “I gave him baby food. Well, it was the only thing available at the Pet Shop at that time, and LMGT was really hungry.”

“ARRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” shouted Awesome. Now THAT’S how a volcano blows it’s top!

“Oh, yeah, Awesome hates pookies.” said Cp kid.

Chapter 18

Awesome had brought a life-saving device with him. It was a…

a…

A…

LADDER!

Awesome was too mad at that moment, so Johnny pulled it out of Awesome's bag.

Tears were streaming out of everyone’s eyes! Awesome deserved a Nobel Happiness Prize!

The six penguins got out of the hole.

“Fresh air!!!” said Cp kid.

Chill, Cp kid and Johnny were never more happy to breathe!

The next day, LMGT and Awesome were in hospitals. LMGT, who was in the mental hospital, had a severe case of the pookies, while Awesome, in the burn treatment area, had blown his head off.

Well, the six penguins enjoyed peace for a long time to come… or maybe not that long.

~~FIN~~